Starch
LIGHTS UP
(At the local dry cleaner, JOHN is working behind the counter as DAVID enters.)
JOHN
Well, if it isn’t my favorite customer.
DAVID
Hey, John.
(DAVID hands JOHN his dry-cleaning ticket; JOHN cheerfully takes the ticket and briefly exits, returning with DAVID’s clothing.)
JOHN
Here we go, one suit, one jacket, and four collared shirts. Did you want to drop anything off today?
DAVID
No. I’m sorry, John, but I’m just here to gather my things.
JOHN
What are you talking about?
DAVID
There’s no easy way to say this – I’ve been seeing another dry cleaner. And I’m going to be moving all my clothes over there.
JOHN
Wait … what?
DAVID
I know this probably comes as a shock to you.
JOHN
I’ve been your dry cleaner for ten years.
DAVID
I know.
JOHN
Did that decade mean nothing to you?
DAVID
In the beginning, they were some of the happiest years of my life. I was climbing a corporate ladder; you were keeping my one and only suit clean. But … I don’t know … People change.
JOHN
You got the big promotion with your nice clean suit and now you just forget about me like I’m yesterday’s garbage?
DAVID
It’s not that simple.
JOHN
It really is, David. Don’t be naïve. You could have chosen to be loyal to me.
DAVID
You don’t always make it easy, you know? I come here after a long day of working, just wanting to get my suits cleaned, but some days I have to listen to you complain about your mother for half an hour before you even take my clothes!
JOHN
Well excuse me for thinking you cared.
DAVID
John, I care, I just –
JOHN
Who is he?
DAVID
John, don’t do this.
JOHN
I have a right to know who’s cleaning your suits now.
DAVID
John, just let it go. Okay.
JOHN
Tell me!
DAVID
It’s Juan Lopez, okay!? I’ve been taking my suits to Juan Lopez.
JOHN
Juan Lopez!?
DAVID
His shop is just around the corner from the office; it’s on my way home. I just stopped in once because it was convenient. But … he was really good.
JOHN
What does Juan fucking Lopez do for you that I don’t.
DAVID
Sometimes he starches my shirts so hard, I can’t even move.
JOHN
Get out.
DAVID
John, don’t be like that.
JOHN
Get out!
DAVID
John, just wait, listen to me. I never meant to hurt you. And I’m sorry that it happened this way. It’s my fault. It’s all my fault.
(JOHN wipes away a few tears.)
JOHN
I hate you so much right now.
DAVID
I deserve that.
JOHN
David. I’m disappointed that we couldn’t work things out between us, but I want you to be happy with your dry cleaning. And I’m sorry too if I wasn’t more … available … for you.
(DAVID gives JOHN a big hug, the plastic covering the dry-cleaning crinkles softly as they embrace.)
JOHN
I really enjoyed these last ten years.
DAVID
I know. Me too.
(DAVID opens the door to leave but looks back.)
DAVID
Maybe … I’ll bring my socks by sometime. Just for a quick softening?
JOHN
I … I’d like that. But … it is not a good idea. I’m sure Juan can soften your socks.
DAVID
You’re right. Goodbye, John.
(DAVID leaves.)
LIGHTS.
People grow together…they shrink…
This gave me a good chuckle! The initial suggestion was inspired by the epic “Break-up” between Trump and Elon so I love that you went in an unconventional way for the relationship in for this break-up.